Changes in Uncensored from Texas Death Row:

[sclcookie]

June 01, 2006

Some of us with the CCADP forum and various other Anti-Death Penalty Form started a new forum in order to have a place where families and friends of Death Row inmates can feel safe. You can go here: ncadp.proboards92.com/ to check it out.

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By Robert Pruett 999411 aka Simple Man

Week 20 2006

May 15, 2006

Yesterday was a productive one; I wrote five letters, wrote my journal entry, and read a few chapters of Brimstone. (That book is like 650 pages long, it'll take me awhile to finish it only reading 10-15 pages a day). My intentions were to get up this morning and write the two letters that haven't been responded to, but I opted to work on chapter two of my story today. I just might be able to finish this chapter by next week if I take care of business. But I don't want to neglect my friends, so I'll write those two letters as soon as I finish this entry.

I think I missed 4 out of 5 days of rec last week because I chose to write rather than rec. I know I can't live like that, I gotta get out of this cell and interact with people and work out. Tomorrow we go out first (outside) up here on two row, I plan on heading out and exercising most of the two hours. In fact, I'm going to rec every day this week for sure. Getting my story out is important, but I mustn't neglect my health, mental and physical, doing so.

So who's going to check out the new movie, "The Da Vinci Code?" Did you know that the lead character, Robert Langdon, is based on the late American mythologist Joseph Campbell? I didn't until here recently when my friend sent me an article with that info in it. Mr. Campbell's writing (particularly his classic, "The Hero With a Thousand Faces") has inspired me more than anything else in my life. Before my friend introduced me to his books, I struggled with the various religions of the world trying to comprehend the nature of God. In retrospect, the insights that I gained from Campbell seem like common sense, but that's not so. People have universal truths revealed to them daily, but if you're not ready to receive them, they won't register. They'll go into one ear and out the other, as my mother used to say. And I think a prerequisite for being ready is diligently and wholeheartedly seeking illumination. When the veil was lifted from my eyes I was at my wit's end, on the threshold of insanity, and all of a sudden it clicked. I recall shedding tears of joy, laughing uncontrollably, breathing heavily, and silently thanking God for enlightening me!! My life hasn't been the same since..........BTW - Joseph Campbell's "The Hero With a Thousand Faces" inspired George Lucas' Star Wars movies.

May 16, 2006

If yesterday was a productive one, today was the polar opposite!! I did wake up at 5:50am and go outside first round of rec., and I did work out while out there, but that's about all I've done all day and it's shift change (6pm)! I spent most of the day talking to guys in the dayroom. The buzz on the pod is about the NBA play-offs, particularly the Dallas vs. San Antonio series, which has Dallas up 3 games to 1 in a 7 game series. There are a lot of guys from San Antonio on this pod and they've been crying about their Spurs all day! :-) I'm pulling for Dallas, it's all good to me.

Self-deception has been a big topic in my life as of late. It seems like everywhere I turn, I see it roaring its ugly head. I have talked to at least five individuals over the past couple of weeks who are convinced that they will walk away from death row free men. I have no idea what kind of issues they have in their cases, but I wish them the best of luck because they will need it. I would guess that at least 85 percent of the people here on the row, probably more than that, are convinced that they will walk away from this place, that they won't be executed. I don't have the statistics in front of me, but I guarantee you that 85% of the people on Texas' death row are not walking away! In fact, I think there has been less than 10 people (since the death penalty has been reinstated) who've had their convictions either dismissed, vacated, or been acquitted in a new trial. Nevertheless, the vast majority here refuse to believe that they will die here. Is that self-deception, or just being overly optimistic?

The guy I was talking to earlier said, "I like to read the 'Wall Street Journal' because I want to learn how the economy works so I can be prepared when I get out." I asked him if he had already received a reversal and he said he hadn't, but he expects one. I wished him the best and changed the subject.

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying it’s wrong or foolish to believe you won't die here. There's always a chance so long as you are alive and you never know what will happen in life. In the movie, "The Shawshank Redemption," the actor Tim Robbins said, “Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies." And so many people here, and everywhere else in prison, live their lives, keeping the hope. And I agree that it's a good thing. But I also agree with another line in that same movie, "Get busy living, or get busy dying." Yeah, that last one sounds more like me.

I don't know what will happen tomorrow. The possibilities are endless. No matter how much we plan ahead and prepare for the future, we can't accurately predict what will happen all of the time. In fact, we can't accurately predict it 10 percent of the time, and that's probably a generous number. It's kinda like victims of Katrina or any other hurricane saying, "f*ck this, I'm moving away from the damn ocean, I'm tired of all these hurricanes!" and they move somewhere like Indiana or Kansas and think, "Yeah, this is more like it." Then a tornado kills them. Or the guy who was exonerated from death row a number of years ago. I imagine he wiped his brow upon receiving the news that he'd be free soon and planned for a long fulfilling life. He got killed in the free world not long after his release. My point is that we don't know what will happen next. So why exert all of your energy worrying about something not in your control? I'm not saying don't plan ahead and prepare for your future, that would be foolish, but why spend all of your time fretting over it after you've done what you can do? I read a quote one time that said something along the lines that 90 percent of what we worry about happening never happens anyway. A wasted experience if you ask me.

I'm not worried about these folks killing me. I'd like to optimize my experiences on this plane of reality, gather an abundance of them as well, but to me it's a waste of this moment provided to me to dwell on something out of my control. Life is too short for that. I'm not afraid of death, it has no power over me, it's just another part of the cycle of life.

May 17, 2006

It's 2:45pm and I'm waiting to go to rec. What better way than to holler at the world? Yeah, right! More like the handful of you who have the patience to read this. Anyhow, it might be second shift before they rec me because they like to feed chow with the dayrooms empty. They might rack the guys in the dayroom up (yeah, kinda like balls on a pool table! ;-)), feed chow, then let second shift finish up the last round of recs. I shall soon see. Actually, they just told me to get ready for rec, so I will wrap this up and prepare it to send out. I have work to do when I return from rec. Talk to you tomorrow.

May 21, 2006

It has been said that death and taxes are the only certainties in life, but I'd add change to that list. Everything changes, nothing stays the same. And I think a change is in order with regards to my journal entries. I realize that my daily entries are piling up, making it difficult for people to read them in their entirety. So, after some deliberation, I have decided to write weekly, rather than daily, entries. This change will not only reduce the content of my journal, it'll free up time for me to write my autobiography. So it's a win-win situation.

It has been a frustrating week on many levels. I didn't get much work in on my autobiography. After writing a large portion of a first draft on chapter 2, I trashed it and decided to start over. Before I could begin another draft, my radio started acting up on me. I tried everything I could think of to fix the problem, but nothing seemed to work. At one point I was so angry that I slammed my head on my desk! Yeah, I know, I'm retarded ;-) But while I was rubbing my head to alleviate the pain, the light bulb clicked on above my head! Excited, I tried something that I hadn't previously tried and the radio reception came back in crystal clear! The moral of the story? Sometimes it DOES help to bang your head up against hard surfaces!

A problem that we all are experiencing on E-pod concerns our ventilation system. 12 building on these Michael prototype units has central air conditioning and heating, as most of you well know, unlike the other buildings on these units. The other buildings have windows that can be opened though, with the exception of 11 building (a disciplinary building). Right now they have our air conditioner turned off and it's above 90 degrees outside. They claim that they can't turn the air back on because maintenance has the key to the room where the controls are. So we're stuck in a hot box with no ventilation until tomorrow at the earliest. I have a fan, thankfully, but there are guys here who don't and they're burning up right now. If it gets too hot, I have no qualms about getting naked, filling my cell with water and lying down in it to cool off. I've done it before. When an officer asks, "Why are you naked, Pruett?" I just tell them, “Why is the air off? You get the air turned back on, I'll put my clothes back on!" That's why I prefer it be cold rather than hot in these cells. You can always add a layer of clothing when it gets too cold, but it's almost impossible to escape the heat…. I’ll be up bright and early in the morning on top of this issue.

I wrote entries the first three days of this week, so I'll cut this one off here. The Detroit vs. Cleveland game is about to come on, I'll listen to that. I'll catch up with y'all next week.

One day at a time,
Simple Man

Robert Pruett 999411, Polunsky Unit, 3872 FM 350 S., Livingston, TX, 77351, USA

www.simpleman-robertpruett.com

[e-mail] Please take into consideration that inmates do not have access to the Internet. Any correspondence will be printed out and forwarded to Robert by mail. Please allow at least three weeks for Robert to respond and make sure to include a mail address where responses should be sent.

[sclcookie]

June 16, 2006

For those who have a friend on Death Row who are wanting their friend to write for Uncensored, please make sure that it's ok what said inmates legal team first.

I want to remind all readers that William Berkley is no longer a writer for Uncensored. I'm still working on deleting his links. This is a long process with the program I use. I have already deleted his links off of several pages and I'm not finished.

I'm sure Mr. Berkley understands that this website, including Uncensored, amoung various other internet projects that I work on, isn't the only thing I do. I'm sure he understands that I have a personal life also.

I have received some threatening e mails from one of Mr. Berkley's associates and there are some false allegations posted about me and my intentions regarding the death penalty and what I do. I've already requested that I do not receive any further e mails from said associates.

I wasn't intending to post anything about such events, however, I decided to go ahead and share with you readers (especially being that false information is already up on the internet about me for you to read).

I was an active poster in a forum that was against the death penalty, however, there was so much "drama" between fellow anti's, it was rediculous. All it does is give those who are pro-death penalty something to critisize those of us who are attempting to help inmates. The owners of said forum are wonderful in this fight against the death penalty, however, like all of us, things happen to where the death penalty can't be a priority at times. It's nothing to feel guilty about, or make someone else feel guilty about. That's just life.

A few things that recently happened to me....my brother-in-law died, making my sister a widow at 42 years old. And one of my co-workers commited suicide early this week. I'm sure you readers understand that I DO have other things to deal with and I'm doing my best to keep thing site up.

It's a shame that I have to explain why Uncensored isn't always my priority. I'm sure those of you who have a life outside the death penalty understand, but some do not...which is sad.

I'm just as guilty as the rest in taking care of disagreements with fellow anti's the wrong way. One thing that I try to do is just avoid all contact with said anti's. Of course if they come for me, I do answer, however, I know I shouldn't....but I do try to stay as far away from their territory, e.g. their forums, "myspace" pages, etc......which is probably the best thing to do.

To "lie" about fellow anti's, send intimidating e mails, post false allegations is just plain wrong. Hopefully, we will mature and fight against the death penalty rather than fight amoung each other.

hugggz,
Suzanne

P.S. I have some letters (about a month old) for a few of those at Polunsky, however, I don't think you received my last letters, therefore....I just haven't sent them, yet. I'll send them via priority or express mail so they will have to be signed for.


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Uncensored from Runaway Chuck

To all humane and concerned

Two weeks ago a man named William Robinson , Texas Death Row prisoner #000813 cut himself up right before evening shift change at 5.45pm. His life was saved, by happenchance the nurse happened to come by at 5.45pm. His reasons are obvious t most these inhumane and dehumanizing isolation, segregation concrete cages we are kept in 23 hours a day. (Among the various other lists of subhuman forms of derogation , humiliation and starvation.)

This morning I went out to recreation, while in the dayroom the psychologist came out at 9.15am to check on William. I was watching the following events as they unfolded. As she approached his cell, she paused looking at a clipboard, to see (what this mans) prisoner name is, surely with the prior knowledge of his attempted suicide and him being bought back and dumped in the same cell again, his name would be known. To our knowledge there is or was no valid “suicide watch”. The psychologist approached his door and said OH my, Oh Oh, don’t do that, the officer working the pod who was near, came running over, both the psych and the officer began yelling for the picket control officer to call MEDICAL, and get medical down here to the pod. We all watched as the picket officer fumbled with the phone, then replied on the overhead speaker they can’t come right away, they’re busy. About a minute passed at this point again they demanded it was an emergency (we all yelled then) and the picket officer replied they are on their way.

The sergeant was the first to arrive. He first placed his pepper spray in his hand, stepped beside the door, placed in the screened window aiming it at him and then began speaking to him. The sergeant called for the use of force, assault team. Next to arrive was the officers with the camera. Almost 5 minutes have passed now. A second officer arrives with a box of rubber gloves. The assault team arrives “Fully suited up” in body armor and helmets shield and gas masks, with gas. The medical personally follow them in. Its been almost 8 minutes as assault tem and medical enter the area and climb the stairs. (All this time Robinson was bleeding). The camera comes on and the team and medical approaches the cell. The sergeant begins his procedural routine. The assault team lines up by the door with a riot shield. The camera is recording, the sergeant beings his “order” for the offender to submit to restraints or chemical agents will be introduced into his cell. 2nd warning and 3rd warnings are repeated. The assault team stands ready and Mr. Robinson is told that he will be gassed and physically removed by the assault team. (They are near seconds from gassing him).

One must pause and consider the facts, after the fact. Mr. Robinson been here 20 years, is mental ill and wants to end it all, a man at his breaking point. In a mental institution or psych ward they don’t gas and assault sick people. But in the eyes of the state, even an attempt on ones life, gets you no mental health or medical care, compared to what NONE prisoners receive.

Subhuman treatment at the hands of the state has a long and most recent history here on the row, lets pause and reflect on the rise in suicide on death row in the past 5 years, ever since the row was moved to isolation, segregation, these deprivation punishment administrative cages. Most recently on November 2nd , Mr. Tumblin’s deceased hanging lifeless body was shown the disgusting practice of prison policy of gassing first, and asking questions later. Lord rest his soul.

Today Mr. Robinson in the end came out willingly. Round two’s over. One has to wonder how long before he is cycled back through the system and returns yet again to the row, to be placed yet again in the same cold dark empty cell with one sheet and mattress. (As to Tumblin’s and others are and continue to be treated.)

Its of no consequence to the state on these prison guards, their paychecks are signed with our blood, so why would any higher administration or state officials think twice about what is really going on, and on the row, the house of death, is in folding in upon its own structure. Just how many have to act out in anguish before something brings change and a serious look at how and why.

All life deserves respect, condemned or not. I for one am appalled at I see going on. Today, last month, in these past 5 years, not one things been done. It is business as usual as the wheels turn.

My regards to all for your time and support
In struggle
Charles V Thompson
Polunsky Unit
Death Row

NO TITLE….. JUST A NUMBER?

From the day you hear the decision that the death penalty will be sought, a little part of you dies silently – and progressively as the days, weeks, months……and years pass by, life becomes complex. More over memories fade, life’s flare and simplest pleasures – are no more…as the sign read – abandon all hopes yee who enter here (so read the sign at the entrance of death row).

It never takes more than 3 ½ weeks before any new prisoner on the row is faced with the unreal and surreal facts of where they are…. As if it hadn’t been imprinted on them the day they arrived, cause it as burnt into our minds. Most new prisoners on the row will experience an execution shortly thereafter there arrival, or hear talk “there is an execution tonight”. This has to be the worst wake up call ever. Personally in my time on the row I have indirectly witnessed, followed and watched and waited for news on hundreds of men’s lives. In fact, to date, Texas has executed 150 human beings in my short lived tenor on the row.

The day your first appeal is denied a part of your false hopes in our justice system die, and further as on travels through this process he feels less alive. The basic construction of these super seg unit buildings, with gun slit windows 7 feet up on the wall (so you cant see out) to these isolated cages, crypts, it was all though out, planned and designed to break a mans will, punish him physically and mentally. Sensory deprivation, sleep deprivation and seasonal affective disorder (from lack of direct sunlight) also known as S.A.D, these are other clinical and in-depth traumas are experienced. Post traumatic stress disorders are rampid inside these walls. Men, friends, our fellow human beings – have died in these super seg’s while serving time, waiting to die. In the rows 5 years in this segregation unit – several men have made attempts on there very lives.

The day you arrive in Huntsville, you’re treated like cattle. As a D/Row prisoner takes his first walk down the hall at the diagnostic unit – his escorting guards yell “DEAD MAN WALKING”, as other general population inmates scramble to clear the way, and get against the wall – backs to us – by order of police, and the guards yell to them, they’re not to be looking at me – to turn around.

Dying becomes lonely and impersonal because the inmate is taken out of his familiar environment and rushed right into another, unknown jungle. Cuffed, shackled, caged, stripped searched, put through metal detectors, told to dress in new prison whites, and again cuffed, shackled and chained up like an animal. This process continues until a man's very walk to the executioner’s gurney.

From observes point of view, many emotions appear on these men’s faces – anxiety, fear, sadness, calm, some laugh, joke… others are concerned about their very adverse expediters of death – even excusing them, saying “your just doing your job.” Psychologically an inmate, goes through at least 5 stages of confronting there own immanent death. As the hour approaches his conditions change – and worsens for some. Denial is impassable, as it passes eventually, anger may be displayed. The “Why me” stage. This is followed by a bargaining period for some – “Yes they might kill me, but not today, I’ll get a stay”! As the condemned is told there final appeal to our nation’s highest court – the U.S Supreme Court – has been “Denied” reality sets in hard. It is in short, the warden’s job to in so many words, tell the man – its last call – any request etc. When the inmate sees that nothings going to work, or possibly help, often depression sets in. The final stage for some – is acceptance, a passive period in which the condemned is ready to let go. At this point many act and react is respected personal moments, communications and final good byes. I only know a handful of men who fought hard, tooth and mail to the executioner’s gurney.

Not all condemned follow the same progression, most do experience two or more of these stages. These are not normal “Life’s Events” and are such traumatic events, as a death row prisoner can almost smell the death in the air, fear lingers, living it, watching it, witnessing those souls who’ve transverses, your average everyday men, to whom I’ve broke bread with, some shared their most private thoughts, news, lives, losses, heartbreaks, deceased family members, while buried in this dungeon of despair. Never to see them again – just as there condemned comrades. We wait, watch the clock…. See it, hear it, smell it – and live these traumatic events.

Indeed Post Traumatic Stress events occur daily. All too often in Texas – as the executioner’s beck and call moves the wheels of justice of so called civilized society. Another number called – yet it is another human beings last and final call, as we all watch him take his final visit, his final march, with his head held high…. The state can take everything physical – but prisoners make and take with them, lives forever change – these men take their pride, dignity and humanity with them. As humanity cries, shouts, and bereaves in protest – these honorable warriors in the trenches with us, whose cries, call on deaf ears outside Americas busiest death house- The Texas Execution Chamber.

BY CHARLES V. THOMPSON TX DEATH ROW PRISONER # 999306 By Robert Pruett 999411 aka Simple Man

Week 21 2006

May 28, 2006

A Diatribe
In the early years of my captivity, I often dreamt of floating and flying away. Most of the dreams began with me sitting or laying on my bunk, overwhelmed with despair by the thought of eternal isolation. But then I would float up towards the ceiling and fly right through it, a sense of relief and joy washing over me as I glided through the air, free at last! Unfortunately, these dreams usually metamorphosed from flight into a cold courtroom with a corrupt judge and prosecutor, 12 gullible jurors, and an indifferent defense attorney. "Mr. Pruett, a jury of your peers sentences you to 99 years in prison, may you burn in hell for your sins, young man!"

"I'M ONLY FIFTEEN!! I'M ONLY FIFTEEN!! I'M ONLY FIFTEEN!!"

My cellie shook me back to consciousness. "Wake up, dude, you're dreaming!" And after I awoke he wondered, "Bro, what happened when you were fifteen? You were hollering - 'I'm only fifteen' - like someone was trying to rape you." I told him the story and the contents of the dream and he shook his head in disbelief. "Them motherf*ckers did you like that when you was fifteen?! That's f*cking bullsh*t, bro!"

In 1995 Harris County had an 11pm curfew for people under 17, you had to be 16 to get a driver's permit, 18 to buy cigarettes, and 21 to buy alcohol. How old did you have to be to get life in prison? Back then it was 14 and it still is, I think. Where's the sense in that? If you aren't mature enough by ages 14 -16 to smoke a cigarette, drink a beer, drive a car alone, or even stay outside past 11pm, how can you be old enough to make a decision that will effect the rest of your life? When I first arrived in the TDCJ-ID, I was 16 and in a dayroom where they were voting to watch a movie rated R. The guard with the remote looked at me and said, "No can do, we got a minor in the dayroom, decide on something he can watch." I wasn't old enough to see violence, hear curse words, or see a breast, but I was old enough to get 99 years!

What really pisses me off is I didn't kill the guy in my case. I'm not entirely inculpable; I admit that it was all behind my dumbass bullsh*t that he'd still be alive today had it not been for me, but I didn't kill him, my father did that and he confessed to it. I was convicted as a "party" to the offense. Problem is, the murder occurred in Harris County in 1995, the year that county was cracking down on juvenile crime. I think they certified like 156 juveniles as adults that year, three times as many as they ever had previously or after. Furthermore, no county in the USA has ever come close to that number before or since. So I'm a f*cking example. Was it worth it? Did the juvenile crime rate decrease after they went on a certifying binge in 1995? Because if it made kids think about their actions and the juvenile crime rate decreased as a result, then I will shut the f*ck up and be thankful that I contributed in some way to the advancement of society. But it did not result in decreased juvenile crime, at least not from the last report I read. So it was an experiment that didn't work, eh? Motherf*ckers.

The increased juvenile crime rate in 1995 doesn't completely explain why I got such a stiff sentence though. When I was certified to stand trial as an adult on Halloween day in 1995 my judge certified three other 15 year olds. I can't recall all the details, but one guy blew the faces off of two rival gang members, another had a gang related murder, and the other guy had a murder case as well. The one with the double murder got 40 years aggravated, another guy got 20 aggravated, and I think the other received 10 years probation. All of those guys actually killed their victims, while I was charged with inciting my father to murder our neighbor, yet I get more time than all three put together. Where's the justice in that? I've never been able to wrap my mind around my sentence. And I've repeatedly heard from minorities in prison about how hard they got it, how a white man wouldn't have gotten the time that they did. Hmmm..... I was the only white person certified out of the above mentioned four. Happy Halloween, huh?! Trick or motherf*cking treat! It's rarely about race these days, it's all about socioeconomic status. I've been inside these walls for 11 years and I have yet to meet a person who was even close to rich when he was free. All of us certified that day came from ghettos.

I know of four men here on death row who were certified as adults and in the general prison population before coming here. One of those guys is a friend of mine named Lee Taylor, who was certified a couple of months after I was, from my neighborhood, and also given life (TDCJ treats anything over 60 years as life). We were all thrown into the adult system, where we had to fight for our manhood and lives regularly. Want to know what fear feels like? Try fighting a hardened criminal (no pun intended) who has expressed interest in making sweet love to you!! Talk about fighting harder than a motherf*cker! That's the world of the certified juvenile, the kid not old enough to drive a car alone or stay out until midnight. And my situation was amplified because I didn't even kill the man.

How did that make me feel? Well, at first I was naive, thinking that there was no way they would leave me with that sentence. I thought that they would eventually see their error and let me go or reduce my sentence considerably. Wrong. After they denied my first two appeals, they sent me a letter, "Mr. Pruett, we regret to inform you that we can no longer represent you free of charge. If you forward us a check for $20,000.00 we will file your 2254 (federal writ) and any subsequent appeals. Good luck!" Good luck? Son of a bitch, I owed indigent supply like 25 dollars at the time, where the hell was I supposed to get twenty grand? I talked to a couple of guys who were writ writers and they wanted between 400-1,000 to file my writ, I didn't have any money period. In other words, I was stuck with that sentence. That realization hit me hard. I felt aggressive, confrontational, and violent. I detested working for these motherf*ckers, I was bitter, self-destructive, and I hated the world. I wanted it all to just disintegrate; I dreamed of tidal waves, tornados, hurricanes, earthquakes, and plague. Like "Tool's" song "Aenima," I wanted MOM to flush it all away, right down the toilet. How could a just and all-loving god keep letting horrendous sh*t happen to me? God was dead to me, and if he was alive he was a heartless a**hole! f*ck god, I thought, I'll never bow to that dick-sucking punk. I felt cheated of my youth, I felt extreme forms of anger and hate, I was the poster child for misanthropy. Everyone pissed me off, nobody could tell me sh*t.

That was then, this is now. My perspective has changed dramatically, evolved if you will. Somehow, I think that everything happens for a reason. Not predestination, per se, but life situations are presented to us so we can live, experience, and grow from them. There's some hidden meaning for the life I've lived, a lesson(s) to be learned, a contribution to the evolution of the world. Ditto for everyone and everything. That's what I tend to think. I believe that I shouldn't be overly concerned with the past, which I have no control over, or the future, which I have very little influence on. It diminishes what's unfolding before me, I might miss something of significance if I don't focus and remain aware. I don't have to like what transpires in my life, but I think it's best to accept it and move on, learn from it. And the result has been peace of mind, I'm no longer angry at the world.

So what's up with the tangent today?! :-) I've been trying to live equanimously for about a year or so, avoiding attachment. I mean, why get attached to something that's only temporary? I tried to live my life as an unbiased observer, without really taking a position on anything. In reality everything is relative, I reasoned, nothing's absolute. So no matter which position I defend, there's always someone on the other side of the fence. I KNOW that everything eventually changes and returns to the VOID, or quantum field to you physicists, and I was content to just experience it all in a detached sort of way. But not too long ago something dawned on me. I'm here, thrust into the field of opposites, where everything is relative (even time, space and mass according to Einstein's E=MC2) and I AM engaged in the game. I'm supposed to involve myself, perform my duties (haha, I said duty! ;-)), vigorously defend my position(s). And I realize that I can do so completely, yet still know the essence of it all, that all is "good in the eyes of god." Huh? Am I saying that god approves of evil? I'll briefly entertain that occidental concept. "The origin of the opposites good and bad is to be found in the pathos of the nobility and distance, representing the dominant temper of a higher, ruling class in relation to a lower, dependant one." (Friedrich Nietzsche) In other words, back in the game the rulers of the world said that their actions were "good," while the peasant's were "evil," thus the genealogy of morals can be traced to such reasoning. What's good for one person might not be good for the next, likewise with evil. So you see, even morals are relative. Anyhow, I can experience a definitive position and passionately defend it because that's the nature of the game we are all involved in. And, of course, I'm still growing with a lot to learn. Am I making sense? Probably not, but ultimately this is a personal journal and it's about me releasing energy and thoughts for reflection; I'm not trying to satisfy the world, just give you an inside peek at myself. With everything being relative, it would be impossible to satisfy everyone anyhow! :-)

I do want to apologize to ALL for being "repetitive and boring!" :-) Seriously, I don't have access to the internet, and everyone here doesn't make me privy to what they write, so I don't know what all has been written about this place. If I'm repeating something someone else has written, please forgive me...... As far as me being boring, well, that's just my character I guess. Can't help you there! Not a whole lot to report from E-pod this last week. I did have visits Thursday and Friday, both of which were AWESOME!!! The mail has picked back up some. If that's due to your complaints, thank you all very much. Thank you anyhow. Other than that not much going on, I'll catch up with you all next week.

One day at a time,
Simple Man

Robert Pruett 999411, Polunsky Unit, 3872 FM 350 S., Livingston, TX, 77351, USA

www.simpleman-robertpruett.com

[e-mail] Please take into consideration that inmates do not have access to the Internet. Any correspondence will be printed out and forwarded to Robert by mail. Please allow at least three weeks for Robert to respond and make sure to include a mail address where responses should be sent.




James and Suzanne would like to thank all contributors to Uncensored for allowing us to post their writings on www.1prison.com. And a special thanks to Ines and Angela for their help with Uncensored.

[Alyce]

I think I have said this before but Robert is an amazing writter. He has made me feel like he is a good friend of mine or something....it's weird! Robert you are far from being boring. I wish you luck in your fight and just so you know there are alot of "GOOD" people fighting right along side of you!! God Bless!!

Alyce

[sclcookie]

June 18, 2006

This is Ricki Marie's second Father Day without her dad. The following video is
for her:

(You may view video at the www.1prison.com website on the latest Uncensored page)

The Dead Man Walking CD Legacy Edition featuring Bruce Springsteen, Eddie
Vedder, Johnny Cash, Suzanne Vega, Michelle Shocked, Steve Earle, Lyle Lovett,
Tom Waits and others, PACKAGED WITH the never-before-available and award
winning film of the "Not In My Name" Concert (featuring Steve Earle, Annie
DeFranco, Lyle Lovett, Eddie Vedder and others) IS NOW AVAILABLE at ActiveMusic


Uncensored from Runaway Chuck

Courage vs. insurmountable adversity

For most prisoners, just waking up and facing the guard takes courage. Hopes of
appeals, faith in others, often enough unseen and rarely heard from, fills the
heart with despair. This compelled with family or relationship problems,
illness, and financial strains, separation from all we hold dear. One can often
enough feel overwhelming stress. Yet each day over a million American prisoners
face adverse and hopeless situations.

Our prisons don’t focus on structure and rehabilitation for our citizens lives.
To the contrary they warehouse them like cattle. The stories of the sacrifices
made by prisoners and their families are lonely, grueling and depraved. The
very things we endure with humility for our loved ones. But the quieter acts of
courage, all these people embark on everyday, on both sides of the fences.

We the core of this country, fathers, brothers, uncles, aunts, mothers,
sisters, its us, the people who have to raise the bar and stand for what is
ethical, to say “NO” to dishonesty, to question adversity when we stare the
machinery of our just and noble system down. We should choose constructive
activity aver apathy, or shall we side with an unpopular cause? Being
politically correct seems to influence people’s belief systems in this day and
age. Often enough stereo types are rapidly jumped to and made. What is
admirable even noble is courage in the face of insurmountable adversity.

Courage that is infinite, unconditional providing the foundation for those who
battle in life’s daily struggle.

In a country that’s transported from Jim Crow to civilized, after abolition of
slavery towards equal rights for all. Even rising above what appeared to be
overwhelming odds, during and era when women rights were minimal, we as
civilized country have come for indeed. What’s our next step one might ask?
Using that courage to ask, to seek, even question and fight for our people. Ask
your friends, families what would it take for you to rise up and stand up for
those who are imprisoned?

Honesty does it tear at the love of our advanced society to say it’s just to
kill, or imprison humans for life.

What would take for you to break the moulds? Assume we are routinely affected
and discriminated against in most cases outright despised.

Its safe to assume in our modern day abolition movement that there is an
ongoing debate over the rights of death row prisoners, do and don’t desire.
Under these circumstances would you be willing to go against the grain, and
speak out. Aren’t your outraged by our behavior? Would it be enough that you
express the wrong witnessed monthly across this nation? Or would you need to
have some emotional investment in me before you speak up? Would we for
instance, have to be related? Or see me executed before you change?

In such circumstances injustice ceases to be distant and abstract concepts
faced by abstract people, but real threat that’s faced ad lived, endured by the
ones we loved. Use courage to step out of your comfort zones, extend yourselves
a little for humanity, beyond what the “norm” is, and be brave, show moral
character, exercise your nature, show progress and basic human rights. We all
continue to evolve. ABOLITION NOW!

Respectfully
Charles Thompson
Texas Death Row

IN MEMORY OF IT ALL

The execution of another friend, yet again in a seemingly endless rift, has
tarnished, faded and utterly crushed my objective for the past few weeks. I’ve
not had the inspiration or motivation to rekindle the flame and keep the
passion and plight of my convictions, and our very uphill fight on going.

First off with all due respect to the Victims of murder and the lives lost,
family forever torn and hurt, I by all means and with much self analysis and
considerations always take first and foremost their feelings into
consideration. Before I write anything encroach on the very sensitive subjects
and the Death Penalty.

Secondly I’d like to share with you that from this side of the razor wire
fences, it’s very hard. I speak for myself when I say it is a foreign world I
never imagined existed. One of the hands challenges personally was, believing I
could change, finding in inner strength and courage to think and act
differently from the way I had in the past. I needed to realize that I was
locked into a repeating cycle, of mistakes, self esteem long ago hit bottom
(all time low) without a doubt to change I had to let go consciously of the
past and understand my dilemma.

The turning Point was after a year on death row, Id also but given up on life.
It was a couple of friends (both executed who stirred my awakening and shed
light on my self despair and who stirred my awakening and shed light on my self
despair. I had run up against the proverbial brick wall of this all. My
memories, beliefs, lack of education, trials and tribulations the key meaning
of life. It’s safe to say I felt unwanted. And so it began, I started
re-teaching myself and to this day I am learning, consider me learned.

To try and remain detached is impossible. Our lives in here are an open book to
all. The gripping stories told daily, of past conflicts, errors, poor choices
and life’s roads, indeed even the war story like tales of men’s ventures as
they traveled down the wrong road after crossing the crossroads in their lives.
It’s relived, retold and resold daily. Intellectually most don’t brag or
glorify any wrongs or bad acts, most of the public would be utterly surprised
by the true nature and manner of Texas Death Row. The fact is it’s laid back
and non confrontational most of the time. It is a different world than the
general prison population. Not to say it’s easy, its NOT. What death row is,
can be summed up as a segregated, isolated, repressive, deprived environment
that’s devoid of any major human contact, interaction or normally, the concrete
cages were designed to break and mask will and spirit, compile that with the
immeasurable stress of immanent death, lack of activity, a will to be active or
exercise. It’s discouraging to hear or watch a man express his lack of will to
live.

I often reflect on the experiences of the past years, especially when I’ve felt
impatient abut another’s slowness to response to a direction that seemed
obvious to me. It’s been helpful to ask am I forging ahead in a way that leaves
other people behind. Or am I willing to support them as they take their steps
forward? Indeed it’s the later, as was shown me when I arrived here.

An amazing legacy, an unrenowned vision of our plight resides inside the walls
of death row. It’s been said that the best leaders are the best servants. A
leader – or the spirit of leading serves in a fusion of educating others about
the vision valuing to contribute and put forth effort. I’m talking about what
comes from – for instance, an older death row prisoner who knows his final
years arrived and watching the continuing cycle, as a new kid arrives, the
exchange, the student teacher relations begin, questions flow and it becomes
all to clear the vision, the new guy receives: in a way a torch passed to him.
The origin of every good idea, remains in the charge of the idea as it
gradually unfolds, refolds and matures in life, and you just fight to survive,
don’t give up, and put your best forward. The issues are complex, the cases
heinous, but every single one of them is human. It’s our nature to error, yet
do we all not pick up the pieces and correct our errors? Don’t we all
eventually learn from our mistakes? It’s amazing witnessing the transformations
that happen in here. It also pains me to see a new prisoner, what I once knew
in a good friend whose been executed, it’s a vicious cycle, I have to pause
often, as I do, realize, see, witness, and know beyond a shadow of doubt, that
executing them is not the answer. Rehabilitating them can be a reality, its
going on to this day, behind these walls.

What I have learned from it all? That’s easy, what I’ve lived through, helped
and contributed and endured, what we all live, is the product and by product of
humanity at its worst. The throwing away to Gods greatest gift to man, mankind
itself, the execution of a human life!

For the sake of the future, in the spirit of peace and forgiveness,
understanding and closure could we not reach out to understand instead of
acting on the deep emotional division, hurt, anger and pain, you can maintain
civility only of your adversary as human, most portray death row as monsters.

By dehumanizing your adversary (the death row prisoner), through derogatory
labels it makes it easier to hate, or kill, and in the case execute, its
destructive to the common good. Violence begets violence, incivility begets
incivility, when getting even (In justice?) or a legal argument, it may seem
justified, we must look at the bigger picture, look within, stop and ask
ourselves, remind ourselves that we are called to a better way of living, to a
place of common humanity.

Lastly Id like to reference to the questionable practice of predicting the
future dangerousness of a man, in order to take his life. It’s just a legal
psychological junk science, it’s been disproved, by the studies in the field of
psychology, by the Texas defenders office study “False Predictions of future
Danger”, and by peers in the test study and it’s been in the courts since. I
have read countless cases debunking it. It is just another form of legal
dehumanizing our criminal justice system uses, that our courts elected
prosecutors use it to dehumanize these human beings. After the last person to
testify in a death penalty case is the psychologist who makes a bogus,
unsupported claim.

This expert witness, a psychologist, uses a personality test used in prisons,
mental hospitals, its outdated, imaginative at best, very misleading at the
very least and often, incorrect. Its roots and founders were each used in
stereotypical labeling, not only by race and ethnic stereotypes but
geographical to. The MMPI test (which Texas uses) a test said to gauge human
nature, was originally developed for the mentally ill. It’s now administered to
15 million Americans a year. In spite of the fact, that it features invasive
questions about persons sea life bathroom habits and is full of misleading
questions with multiple choice questions that defy common sense. It’s not a
test of reasoning with factually correct and incorrect replies.

In a courtroom, its use is unquestionably sound. In the often questionable
practice of predicting the future, also referred to as a psalm reading, the use
is a gross injustice and a front to our judicial system, with important
outcomes left in the wake of the MMPI test. Often child custody cases, the
sentencing of a criminal in our case, the sentence of death, this is just one
of the many inaccurate and dangerously disingenuous practices used to cleanse
state approved and dehumanization of the human life they will ask a jury 12
average people to condemn a person to die.

A lot get lost, misinterpreted, censored and white washed in translation of
these complex controversial struggles, some remain silent, while others
respond. Our world is not exactly simplistic, suffice to say, given how complex
our world is. The quest is for survival, its baric instinct.

In our voyeuristic society, it appears people believe what they see, hear and
as the movies and books sell, violence pain, suffering and persecution sells.
Guess the question is how long will we buy it, or into it. I reflect on these
pro death penalty justice groups silence during the Green execution as, well ,
you be the judge. You, the society. Victim’s rights justice for? The victims
family pleads he is spared, the DA appellate division said its all folks, in
quoting Roe Wilson “legally it doesn’t matter”.

I dissent, it did matter, it does matter, Mr. Green was a classic example of a
young man reformed and he made a difference in our plight and his case shows
exactly what is wrong with the system.

Disappointed and disturbed
Charles Thompson
Polunsky Unit
Death Row By Robert Pruett 999411 aka Simple Man

Week 22 2006

June 4, 2006

The question of free will has intrigued me for a number of years. Not to get
all philosophical on everyone (stick with me for a second), but do we really
have our own volition? Are we truly autonomous beings? I think most behavioral
scientists think that human behavior has both biological and environmental
components. Of course, there are a few who are either on one side of the
spectrum or the other; those who think that our genetic makeup wholly
determines our behavior, and those who think that the environment in which we
are reared totally shapes who we are. But I think most believe that our
behavior is a combination of both of these, an interaction of the organism with
its milieu. So where does free will come into play? That seems to be an area
behavioral scientists shy away from; they would rather philosophers address it
because of the political ramifications. But there are a few who have addressed
it and, from what I've read, most think that our genes predispose us to certain
basic behaviors and the environment works to shape and develop complex
behaviors. The common consensus is that while these factors influence our
behavior, they don't determine it. We can resist genetic commands, we can
overcome our environment.

But I wonder. Let's say we got a kid who's genetically predisposed to
addiction, such as alcoholism, and this kid is raised in a family full of
alcoholics who passed this genetic makeup to him/her. If this person never
touches alcohol, there's no chance he/she will succumb to alcoholism, but the
likelihood of that happening growing up around booze is slim to none. So how
much free will does such a person REALLY have? They have no control of their
genes or the environment they are born into, and none of us do. A person
predisposed to addictive behaviors has a much more difficult time of resisting
or disobeying inclinations than someone who doesn't. I do think we have free
will, and we can overcome whatever situation we are born into, but, more often
than not, people give in to genetic inclinations and develop according to their
genetic makeup. So yes, we have free will, but all of our decisions are
influenced by a multitude of factors out of our control.

I've read studies on criminality and there being a genetic factor involved, as
well as a socioeconomic one. I've been in prison over a decade and I've
observed that most people here come from rough backgrounds and have numerous
family members who were also convicts. That substantiates those studies in my
eyes. But I've heard the argument, "What about the kid from the ghetto who
makes it out and goes on to live a productive life in society?" Yes, that
happens, I was once in love with a girl who I'm sure made it out, but, more
often than not, it doesn't. Personally, I'm inclined to believe that it's an
anomaly related to genetics when this happens; the person is wired to be strong
enough to overcome his/her environment. Unfortunately, everyone isn't blessed
to be like that.

So what's my point? Well, I think that we have the knowledge to correct a lot
of wrongs, to provide each criminal an opportunity to rehabilitate, to overcome
counterproductive inclinations. So why is the justice system adverse to
rehabilitation? (There are programs in place in TDCJ that can be utilized and
rehabilitation is possible, but each individual must dig inside and find it in
him or her to try to change. Rarely, if ever, will the administration encourage
this. Conversely, they promote just the opposite, and deny "chronic rule
violators," or death row for that matter, any chance at rehabilitation.)
Because, ultimately, it's not about rehabilitation, it's about revenge. If you
do something wrong, you must be punished. Forget about helping you overcome
your counterproductive behavior. When I think about it (I try not to think
about it, it makes me feel very violent when I do), what bothers me is that so
many people, particularly politicians, assert that revenge isn't a factor in
criminal justice. That is all it has ever been about. I'm not necessarily
opposed to revenge (if you hit me, I will definitely hit you back, etc...), I
just wish they'd be straight up about it and let the world know what it REALLY
is: punishment; an eye for an eye.

I'm gonna say something here that will piss a whole lot of people off: There
wouldn't be a death penalty in these United States if it wasn't for
conservative Christians. They are the ones shouting an eye for an eye, f*ck
some rehabilitation. It's not about helping humanity, it's about quenching a
thirst for blood that has motivated them and their like for millennia. They
can't bum "witches" at the stake anymore, they can't go on crusades and murder
non-believers anymore, so they gotta satisfy their thirst for blood somehow and
the death penalty does it for them. There's no doubt in my mind that more
people have been murdered in the name of Jesus than any other being. It's not
about Jesus to these people though. If it was, they would listen to his words:
"You have heard that it was said, 'an eye for-an eye, and a tooth for tooth.'
But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the
right cheek, turn to him the other also." (Matthew 5:38-39) I guess they think
Jesus was drunk when he said that?! :-)

I can't say that I'm against a death penalty, per se, but I am opposed to
what's been going on in America, especially the murder of innocent people.
There are flaws in the system and they should be corrected, I think. But I
won't say I'm totally against a death penalty. Why not? Well, if I had a kid
and he/she was raped and murdered, I would hope to be able to wrap my hands
around the murderer's throat and squeeze the life out of him/her myself. But
I'd like to put my boots on first and do me a little dance atop the murderer.
That's just me, I'm vengeful like that. And that's the reason we have a death
penalty, people want revenge. But shouldn't we make sure a person did the crime
first? If there's the slightest possibility that the accused didn't kill the
victim, then I think life in prison is appropriate. And if the accused has been
incontrovertibly proven guilty, then I think it should be up to the family of
the victim to decide if death is the penalty. I mean, it's about vengeance,
right? Well, let the family members kill the condemned, if they want to kill
them. A lot of times it isn't the family members wanting death, it's a
bloodthirsty public. I think the new Tool song sums it up nicely, "I need to
watch people die from a distance....vicariously." It's sick, I know, but that's
how a lot of people are. They have no connection to the victim or the family,
they just like death. Sick. Perverted. Depraved. It's humanity at its finest.

But I’m about rehabilitation, I really am. I think we have the knowledge to
ascertain and heal people's psychological problems and reintegrate criminals
into society, if we really want to that is. Problem is, a lot aren't about
that, as I've said, and those who are haven't taken the right approach, at
least not from what I've seen. I've yet to read any literature discussing the
many influences on the psyche of the criminal (and how his/her behavior is
shaped and influenced by factors outside of his/her control; i.e genetic makeup
and socioeconomic status) and its relation to criminality, particularly the
death penalty. Why aren't opponents to the death penalty (and the
non-rehabilitation methods being employeed by the justice system) using the
abundance of evidence from the field of behavioral science to fight their
cause? I recently heard that these people tried to in the 70s, but abandoned
that approach because of a lack of evidence back then to support their claims.
It's 2006, there's plenty of evidence now and it's easy to find. But I wonder
how those who are hell-bent on vengeance would respond? What would be their new
approach if the anti-Dp movement were to utilize the information provided by
the scientific community to propagate their cause? You think they'd say, "Okay,
it's not REALLY about anything except blood, now step aside so I can watch this
motherf*cker die!" It would be interesting to see their reaction.

Have I managed to piss enough people off yet?! :-) Not my intentions, but that
happens when you defend any position. You upset the ones on the other side of
the fence and you incite the ire of some of those on the side you're on when
you tell it like it is. I really don't give a sh*t. These people are most
likely gonna kill me soon anyhow. I just felt like stirring some sh*t up. If
you're about social reformation and ending the death penalty, then be about it
seriously. How do you think civil rights leaders accomplished their goals? The
observations that there wouldn't be a death penalty if it weren't for
conservative Christians and that anti-death penalty/prison reform activists
should employ similar tactics as civil rights leaders from the 1960s are those
of the OLD SCHOOL. Desperate situations call for desperate measures. And, of
course, it helps to have a sound argument and people willing to sacrifice for
their beliefs. You want some firepower from the field of psychology? I can list
the sources. But hey, what happens if the death penalty is abolished and
serious measures are taken to circumvent criminality? What do you have to
"fight" for then? Where goes the people you loved gossiping with? The truth is
a bitch, I know it. The fact is, if the death penalty was abolished and the
justice system worked out its current problems, there would be a lot of lonely
people left in the wake. Ouch. ;-)

Everything is good in the eyes of god, or so they say. I don't know. I'd like
to climb a mountain, go skydiving, explore the pyramids, study with particle
physicists, dive into a pool, visit the Grand Canyon, have sex, drive a car, go
see Shinedown in concert! ;-) But, I know, there's something here to learn. I
sincerely hope to learn what I'm supposed to learn, and maybe in my next life I
can do some of those aforementioned things. I truly wonder what it must be like
to experience the polar opposite of my position(s), the other side of the fence
so to speak. Or maybe I already know, I just forgot? Maybe I'll remember when I
transcend this wasteland.

Life here is the same as usual. My autobiography is humbling me, truly kicking
I disagree. But I'm innately a fighter, I will prevail. It might take longer than I
had initially hoped though. But hey, I knew going in the nature of
things.......

One day at a time,
Simple Man

Robert Pruett 999411, Polunsky Unit, 3872 FM 350 S., Livingston, TX, 77351, USA


www.simpleman-robertpruett.com

[e-mail] Please take into consideration that inmates
do not have access to the Internet. Any correspondence will be printed out and
forwarded to Robert by mail. Please allow at least three weeks for Robert to
respond and make sure to include a mail address where responses should be sent.





James and Suzanne would like to thank all contributors to Uncensored for
allowing us to post their writings on www.1prison.com. And a special thanks to
Ines and Angela for their help with Uncensored.

[sclcookie]

June 22, 2006

Prior to Rich being executed, he requested that I post his Use of Force tapes for the public to view. Here is the Use Of Force on December 20, 2004 in which Richard Cartwright made his decision to take over Uncensored from Texas Death Row. Here is the link to the Uncensored article Rich wrote refering to the video below: www.1prison.com/rcundec312004tojan012005.html.

As some of you are aware, I allowed those who I thought to be supportive of Rich and his family to view this second video prior to posting for everyones viewing. I will do the same with any others I post here being that there were some awful things stated about Rich from non-supporters and this way his supporters could let the videos "sink in" or give them some time to feel what they feel prior to seeing nasty comments about other UOF.

I don't know if you remember my comments from when I viewed said videos the first time myself, but you will find in this Uncensored: www.1prison.com/rcunapr05to102005.html. I heard many people say that people need to see the abuse that goes on by CO's in prison. In my opinion, I don't think these video's show said abuse. That's just my opinion of course.

Most of you know I believe in prisons. I believe in LWOP. I just don't believe in the death penalty. I think murderers should be locked up.....many for the rest of their lives.

Now as far as the UOF's go....or as far as Rich's go, as far as Paul's go and those men who were on F-Pod at those time. They were demonstrating for.....you can read their Uncensored's to find out if you don't know.

I've seen comments on how the first UOF appeared cut off at the beginning. That's how I received said tape. That's the one that you really need to listen to. Listen to what Rich is saying to that CO behind the camara.

I don't know if you've heard of the D.R.I.V.E. Movement, but you really should check it out.

I think the abuse these inmates are refering to is what leads up to the UOF in the first place (not all of course), the reason why they are demonstrating. Of course not all are demonstrations. (I, personally, don't believe the first UOF posted on this site was a demonstration, however, that's just me.....the others being posted, however, demonstrations....I'm sure you will notice when you watch said videos and read the Uncensored refering to said videos.)

Think about it. What is the purpose of a UOF? To gain control of an DEATH ROW inmate who is breaking the rules. Remember, these guys are convicted of MURDER, regardless of our stance on the death penalty or our support for any particular inmate.

Well, if said inmate "jacks-the-cuffs" or keeps a food tray or etc, knowing the consequences, i.g. UOF, said inmate may be demonstrating against said abuse, however, doesn't make the UOF the abuse. If you notice reading Rich's Uncensoreds, after those guys broke the rules a few times in order to be heard, they were later being heard, therefore, less UOF's and more problem solving (even if only temporarily). It's sad that they have to resort to such to be heard.


(go to the htttp://www.1prison.com website to see said video)

The Dead Man Walking CD Legacy Edition featuring Bruce Springsteen, Eddie Vedder, Johnny Cash, Suzanne Vega, Michelle Shocked, Steve Earle, Lyle Lovett, Tom Waits and others, PACKAGED WITH the never-before-available and award winning film of the "Not In My Name" Concert (featuring Steve Earle, Annie DeFranco, Lyle Lovett, Eddie Vedder and others) IS NOW AVAILABLE at ActiveMusic

By Robert Pruett 999411 aka Simple Man

Week 23 2006

June 11, 2006

Darkness. The window blocked out, all the cracks in the door sealed up, the light turned off. Just past midnight, I sit in the full lotus position in dead silence, breathing slowly and deliberately, methodically observing every inch of my body with my mind’s eye, taking a mental note of each sensation and moving to the next. I’m relaxed yet aware. Throughout the day, I can comprehend the Eastern concept of Maya, but here I feel exactly what they mean. Wow. It’s at once scary and exhilarating; scary because of my over identification with this form, exhilarating because I know it’s just a dream, it’s not really real.

This realization makes it hard for me to go on sometimes. The position I’ve been thrust into hasn’t been very comfortable. Not that any other one is, it’s just that mine seems extra screwed up some days. I’ve entertained thoughts of disengaging, but I know I won’t do so of my own volition, if that’s even a possibility. Somehow, I believe I’m doing this for a real reason, like there’s a purpose. So I stay here, making the best of the situation, learning everything I can. Furthermore, I’m feeling the fire again, the burning inside that I’ve only partially been experiencing: passion. It’s like dancing gleefully in the rain, releasing a thunderous growl, or singing at the top of your lungs! These moments had been far too infrequent, but I know I can confidently lunge forward and laugh in the face of death because it’s all an illusion anyway, there’s no reason to be afraid. Of course, when the doubts resurface, I can always retreat to the abyss for a moment and feel what’s really real.

In case you’re wondering, Simple Man comes from the great Lynyrd Skynyrd song, but, truth be told, I was really inspired by Shinedown’s cover. And, no, it’s not an oxymoron (although, I do feel like a moron sometimes! ), it’s something to strive for, a lifestyle I’d prefer to live. You don’t have to be dense to live a simple life.

On Saturday, June 3rd, I was out at visitation waiting for my sweetheart (Hi Jolee ;-)) to arrive for a second round visit. As I sat in the booth, they told the first round visitors to leave and I watched them pass me. A young black guy, probably in his late 20s to early 30s, walked past me, did a double take and looked directly at me, then picked the phone up.

“What’s your name?”
“Robert Pruett.”
“You look familiar.”
“Where are you from?”
“San Antone.”
I shook my head, “I’m out of Houston. What’s your name?”
“Les.”

Before we could continue on and determine if we knew each other, the guard out there made him put the phone down and leave. We looked at each other as he walked away and I thought he looked very familiar, just couldn’t place him.

On Sunday night, as I was laying in bed trying to sleep, I thought about the encounter with this guy the previous night and wondered where the hell I’d seen him before. I kept replaying the scene, asking myself if I knew a Les, when, all of a sudden, it dawned on me! Of course! Les was a guy I worked out with for a few months while on Connally Unit in 1997. He used to call me Nature Boy because I was about 160 pounds back then and could lift the entire stack on the bench press. I worked out with him and a couple of white dudes named Kevin McDaniel and Oklahoma (don’t remember his real name). You never know who you are gonna run into, huh? It really is a small world. If anyone knows Les or who he was visiting, tell him Nature Boy sends his respects and regards!

Chapter Two of my autobiography is giving me more trouble than I ever thought possible. I'm probably about a week away from being finished with it. At this rate it'll be after September before I finish the autobiography, but I'm optimistic that things will pick up shortly. I hope so.

One of the reasons for my optimism is that I've switched my schedule to the night shift. It's very quiet at night and I can get much more work done.... when I get enough sleep during the day. Sometimes it's a pregnant dog sleeping in the day with all the noise and the guards waking you up for a variety of reasons, but I'll manage. There's no real reason to stay up during the day until late July when my next visits are scheduled, so I'll take advantage of this opportunity and try to get some work done.

Ah, the Dallas Mavericks, team of destiny. Everyone I talked to prior to game 1 said there was no way they would be able to handle big Shaq and the slippery D. Wade. I countered by saying that Miami didn't have anyone to contend with Dirk Nowitzki and they weren't nearly as deep, but no one listened. Sure it's only one game, but the boys from Dallas made a statement: Shaq's over the hill and D. Wade will just have to wait until next year. Oh yeah, and Jason Williams, aka White Chocolate, can't guard the explosive Jason Terry. And don't bother bringing the old man Garry Payton in to guard him anymore, he has lost a few steps. I thought Dallas would win it in six or seven going into the series, but I have the feeling they'll close it out on the road in Miami in four or five. The year of the Big German. On that note, I'll close this up and get ready for game 2 of the finals. Got a chili spread in the works, holler at ya next week.

One day at a time,
Simple Man

Robert Pruett 999411, Polunsky Unit, 3872 FM 350 S., Livingston, TX, 77351, USA

www.simpleman-robertpruett.com

[e-mail] Please take into consideration that inmates do not have access to the Internet. Any correspondence will be printed out and forwarded to Robert by mail. Please allow at least three weeks for Robert to respond and make sure to include a mail address where responses should be sent.




James and Suzanne would like to thank all contributors to Uncensored for allowing us to post their writings on www.1prison.com. And a special thanks to Ines and Angela for their help with Uncensored.

[sclcookie]

July 13, 2006

Introduction for Uncensored By Robert Will #999402

We live in a conformist society. Our culture is a culture of acceptance –we are taught not to challenge the status quo. So what of prison and capital punishment? How do they fit into the equation?

For too often I have heard the statements such as “well, if a person is in prison then he obviously deserves to be there and if a person us on death row then they must deserve the death penalty”. These type of things are said out of ignorance; not stupidity but ignorance: the state of ignoring. The human animal learns through either study, observation or experience. How does someone experience, study or observe prison and the death penalty? The corporate media certainly is nor going to give an unbiased perspective. One can read books and Internet articles as well as watch documentaries to learn about the prison industrial complex and capital punishment. Doing so will allow a person to study and observe this System to an extent. But, what of actual experience?

Unless a person is a prison guard or inmate then is hard to gain insight into what goes on behind these walls and how this System really functions. Even among those who experience this System from the inside very few actually understand its nature. My main goal and objective is exposing the True nature of this System by allowing those on the outside an uncensored view from the inside.

Everyone reading this should understand that activism us what I do, it’s what I love. I have been involved in activism since the first day I arrived on death row. I deeply believe that once one recognizes Injustice then inaction is blatant consent and acceptance. I very simply refuse to consent to oppression!

The spreading of information leads to education and education leads to knowledge. From knowledge we gain understanding and understanding will be the final key to abolishing the wretched System of capital punishment here in Texas and the U.S. As long as the death penalty exists society can never be peaceful. We have to challenge the status quo and promote a culture of understanding and peaceful coexistence. By working together we can encourage insight and death row strive toward the healing of Humanity. In writing for uncensored I hope I can contribute in a small way to this Righteous Cause.

In the spirit of Peace and Solidarity
Rob Will

*You can go to my website www.robwill.org to read some of my previous writings and find out more information about me.

Robert G. Will-999402
Polunsky Unit
3872 F.m. 350 South
Livingston, TX. 77351

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By Robert Pruett 999411 aka Simple Man

Week 25 2006

June 25, 2006

Welcome to another edition of, "The Life of a Simple Man!" All apologies for the cancellation of last week's excerpt, our facilities were shutdown due to an increased workload, impossible deadlines, inadequate equipment, and incompetent staff. We've since reduced our workload considerably, but we're still working with antiquated machinery and, for lack of a sufficiently descriptive euphemism, our employees are retards! (BTW – the “employees” and “staff” are me!)

I got some depressing news about 10 days ago. My cousin Jerry died in his sleep several months ago. He was a year younger than me, same body type, same blond hair, although he was a bit shorter and he had awesome green eyes, mine are doo-doo brown. He left behind a wife and kids, three siblings, parents and a bunch of family that thought the world of him. I'm not sure about the cause of death. I seriously doubt it was drug related, he was one of the few in the family without a proclivity for substances, although I guess anything is possible, especially in my family.

I haven't communicated with Jerry in about 11 years. I was pretty close to him and his little brother Tom though. Tom and Jerry, just like the cartoon. Their mother Marcie must've been stoned when she named them. One memory stands out more than any other right now: They were living in The Cove, a Peckerwood neighborhood on the outskirts of Orange, Texas. I'd been up all night getting high at my cousin John's house down the street and decided to walk over to Tom and Jerry's to see what they were up to. Their livingroom was dimmed and Angus Young was screaming full-blast, "You, shook me all night long!" through the monster Alpine's. Jerry was splayed out on his couch, arms streched in a T and legs propped on the coffee table, with the coolest shades you've ever seen and a smile from ear to ear. I was wasted and the sight of him like that made me laugh. I plopped down next to him and removed those shades. "Who the f*ck do you think you are, dude?!"

He just smiled at me. I'll never forget that smile. I remember thinking that the handsome devil would soon have all the girls chasing him. He was the coolest kid in the world right then and there wasn't anything anyone could do to change that. I put his shades back on him and we sat and listened to several AC/DC songs before I passed out.

I've thought a lot about Jerry and many of the times we spent together since I heard about him dying. Even though I've pretty much forgotten my family (it's easier that way, especially when they don't even write), the news of Jerry's death hurt like a sonofabitch. He was one that I thought was bucking the norm in our family, living a good life with a great family and doing something with his life. I've heard that his wife is beautiful and his kids as bright as he. I've heard that he had his own place and a good job, that he was clean. Despite the fact that he never once thought to write me, and even if he did decided not to, I was pulling for him. Now he's gone. One second we're here, full of life, the next we're gone. But HE isn't gone really. I get it. Just the form that we grew to love. He did what he came to do then he left. See you soon. Jerry.

A few weeks ago I wrote about human behavior and its causes. I didn't really elaborate, I don't think. I do recall my main point though: there are an abundance of factors at work that influence our behavior and we're not as autonomous as we would like to think. The New York Times printed an article (www.nytimes.com/2006/06/15/health/15gene.html?) titled, "The DNA AGE: That Wild Streak? Maybe It Runs in the Family," by Amy Harmon. It's a good article on the genetic component involved in human behavior. I encourage all who are involved in the abolition movement and other justice reformation groups to read that article and to investigate the topic, it should be a valuable tool for your cause(s). We live in an era where science rules, you gotta use it to back up your position or you might not be heard.

I dreamt that I was lying in a meadow with dense forest encircling me and in this dream I was dreaming. In that dream I was lying in a meadow with dense forest surrounding me and I was dreaming. In that dream I was in the same meadow, trees all around, dreaming. It was like looking into a mirror at another mirror, at another mirror, at another mirror. Dream overlapping dream, overlapping dream, overlapping dream; all the same dream inside the same dream. And it all seems to reflect the prevalent theme in my life these days: I'm trapped in a dream. Actually, trapped won't work because somehow I wanted in, like I asked to come or something. A f*cking dream. Surreal. Awesome. I wonder if I could somehow shrink to the size of an electron, or even smaller, and float I disagree up out of here, then consolidate into me again on some island where I could swim all day, play music all night, and gratify my every desire in between? Huh? It don't work like that? I gotta play by the rules while here? Hold on a minute, when I dream I can do all these things and then some; if this is a dream, why can't I at least fly every now and then? I feel stupid. Don't pay any attention to me, I have multiple personality disorder! :-) I'm bullsh*tting. I'm healthy mentally, it's this damn body I’m in that’s deteriorating on me. I think it knows it's dying. Like my mind, my body’s retarded. It’s cool though, it’s all a dream; all is good in the eyes of god .It's not bad being here; I feel that I'm progressing, doing what I should, enjoying the moment provided. It's cool. One of these days I'll be back in that meadow, at one with the field.

One day at a time,
Simple Man

Robert Pruett 999411, Polunsky Unit, 3872 FM 350 S., Livingston, TX, 77351, USA

www.simpleman-robertpruett.com

[e-mail] Please take into consideration that inmates do not have access to the Internet. Any correspondence will be printed out and forwarded to Robert by mail. Please allow at least three weeks for Robert to respond and make sure to include a mail address where responses should be sent.

By Robert Will #999402

R.I.P Creeper G’

June 21, 2006-07-05 Wednesday

The news just reported that yesterday, June 20, 2006, La Mont Reese (A.K.A. Creeper G) was executed, but… he refused to submit to his oppressor and he protested his execution! The news also said that Creeper’s mom completely broke down and began violently crying, the she had to be escorted from the T.D.C.J. property by force. The news said that she tried to break through the wall and Plexiglas to get to her son who was strapped down to a gurney being murdered. She kicked 3 holes in the wall before the prison staff “removed her from the premises”.

I got some depressing news about 10 days ago. My cousin Jerry died in his sleep several months ago. He was a year younger than me, same body type, same blond hair, although he was a bit shorter and he had awesome green eyes, mine are doo-doo brown. He left behind a wife and kids, three siblings, parents and a bunch of family that thought the world of him. I'm not sure about the cause of death. I seriously doubt it was drug related, he was one of the few in the family without a proclivity for substances, although I guess anything is possible, especially in my family.

Let me highlight this bold: THERE HAVE BEEN ALMOST 400 EXECUTIONS IN THE STATE OF TEXAS AND ONLY ABOUT 4% OF THOSE EXECUTED HAVE PUT ANY RESISTANCE.
6 men fought and 5 have conducted a sit in and made the officers carry them. 4 of those who have done so after we began our organized DRIVE protest and November 1, 2005 (see my 11-1-06 update). 4 out of 5 who have conducted sit-ins on their execution date have done so after 11-1-05.

Here are a few things to think about:
-10 out of the 11 guys who have protested their executions have been non-Christian. Only 1 guy who protested his own murder was Christian.
-Here are the ethnicities of those who have protested: Here are a few things to think about:

Fought Conducted a sit-in African-American 4 African-American 4 Jewish-American 1 Jewish American 0 Mexican-American 1 Mexican-American 0 European-American 1 European-American 1

Fought Conducted a sit-in
African-American 4 African-American 4
Jewish-American 1 Jewish American 0
Mexican-American 1 Mexican-American 0
European-American 1 European-American 1

I’m sure one could draw all kinds of interesting sociological conclusions from the abovementioned statistics… me and Creeper were cool but we didn’t know each other well; we were only housed around each other for a short time. Yesterday, Creeper had the courage to stand up against this system that oppresses us all and for that he has all of my respect. His act of civil disobedience will definitely inspire others! R.I.P. Creeper G! In the Spirit of Self-determination:

Rob Will

A few weeks ago I wrote about human behavior and its causes. I didn't really elaborate, I don't think. I do recall my main point though: there are an abundance of factors at work that influence our behavior and we're not as autonomous as we would like to think. The New York Times printed an article (www.nytimes.com/2006/06/15/health/15gene.html?) titled, "The DNA AGE: That Wild Streak? Maybe It Runs in the Family," by Amy Harmon. It's a good article on the genetic component involved in human behavior. I encourage all who are involved in the abolition movement and other justice reformation groups to read that article and to investigate the topic, it should be a valuable tool for your cause(s). We live in an era where science rules, you gotta use it to back up your position or you might not be heard.

P.S. My birthday is next week and I want one thing for my birthday: I’d like everyone reading this to listen to these two programs every weekday for the next 2 months: “Democracy Now!” (www.democracynow.org) and “Flashpoints” (www.flashpoints.net). Oh, and hug someone who you haven’t hugged before and, hey, why not commit some random act of kindness that doesn’t involve self-interest?

*You can go to my website www.robwill.org to read some of my previous writings and find out more information about me.

You may contact Robert Will's Defense Committee here: [e-mail].




James and Suzanne would like to thank all contributors to Uncensored for allowing us to post their writings on www.1prison.com. And a special thanks to Ines, Angela and Eleonora for their help with Uncensored.