davie
New Arrival
Posts: 3
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Post by davie on Jan 13, 2008 21:05:50 GMT -5
Hi all,
ive recentley became interested about writing to a death row inmate but im a bit confused as to what i should and shouldn't speak about to them when writing my first letter to an inmate.
I'll be honest and say that at the present time it'ss more a fasination with me about what life must be lik for a person knowing they are withering away the days in a tiny cell waiting for that call to come saying that their time is up and they have to go and meet their maker. The mental strength of someone in that position bewilders me as i know i would never be able to keep mentally strong under these conditions.
Would it also be ok for me to ask them to tell me what they did and how they feel about it now? I'll be honest again and say i wouldn't be able to keep a healthy correspondance with say a child killer or rapist for example and thsi is probably the reason i would need to what their crime was and the story behind it.
On one hand i feel i may be too intrusive but on the otheri think it would be key to me being able to open upto someone and be able to have a genuine correspondence with an inmate.
Also can someone point me in th right direction as to where i can find a list of inmates currently looking for penpals?
Thanks in advance.
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terri
Settlin' In
Posts: 45
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Post by terri on Jan 14, 2008 12:39:14 GMT -5
hey davie, Yeah I wouldn't ask what they did. Most won't want to talk about it. They want to talk about normal, average things that nobody ever asks them about. For your first letter its best to just introduce yourself and that. Your penpal may tell you with time what they did. I've been writing to mine for almost four years now and he told me after two years what he did and it was never mentioned again. hope that helps somewhat
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davie
New Arrival
Posts: 3
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Post by davie on Jan 14, 2008 17:32:38 GMT -5
Thanks for the advice.
How did you go about choosing who to write to as a penpal. Been looking through a few inmates and seem to be having trouble deciding who to write to at the moment.
Preferablly i would prefer to write to someone my own age (touching 30) but is there any other advice you's could give me on this front?
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terri
Settlin' In
Posts: 45
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Post by terri on Jan 14, 2008 19:58:29 GMT -5
erm well I guess just keep searching and see if anyone jumps out at you? Any that make you laugh, have similar interests or even totally opposite beliefs or something? Basically I just looked for something that I thought I could begin a good conversation about. Personally I stay away from the ones who straight up ask for money. That's their choice of course, but that's not what I'm here for. The inmates that don't want your money are, in my opion, the ones that truely want your friendship. Also if you wanted you could look up what they were charged with (if you really want to). Personally I could never write to a child killer/rapist - its just not something i would ever feel comfortable with. For example, one inmate really stood out in his ad, he made me laugh and had a humorous way at looking at his situation. However, curiosity got the better of me and I looked up of the web what he had done before I wrote to him. I found out that he was arrested for raping a 15 year old girl and I just couldn't do it.
Of course though, at the end of the day, its your choice. Keep looking until someone stands out to in some way. Good Luck!
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Post by misslola on Mar 23, 2008 12:08:06 GMT -5
Hi Terri,
I also live in the UK and am intesreted in starting to write to an inmate. I have a few questions though if you wouldn't mind helping me...
1) I've found someone I'd like to converse with, should I just write an introduction letter to him or should I ask permission from the Governer first?
2) What are the rules/regulations on what I can/can't send/write?
3) As I live in the UK; should I send stamps to help the inmate pay to reply to my letters?
4) Is it OK to give my home address to reply to my letters?
I really apprieciate any help you can give.
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Post by happyhaddock on Mar 24, 2008 1:08:06 GMT -5
These answers are all my opinion only. Hi Terri, I also live in the UK and am intesreted in starting to write to an inmate. I have a few questions though if you wouldn't mind helping me... 1) I've found someone I'd like to converse with, should I just write an introduction letter to him or should I ask permission from the Governer first? No, not at all. 2) What are the rules/regulations on what I can/can't send/write? They vary state to state. 3) As I live in the UK; should I send stamps to help the inmate pay to reply to my letters? You'd need US stamps. You might want to consider an inmate payment service, however some inmates get free postage under some circumstances IIRC. 4) Is it OK to give my home address to reply to my letters? Do you have a better alternative? I really apprieciate any help you can give.
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Post by misslola on Mar 24, 2008 5:55:58 GMT -5
Thanks Teri! I think I'm ready now I have a work address I'm allowed to get mail sent to. I think I will write an introduction letter and ask about the rules then x
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Post by pumpkinpie on Mar 24, 2008 11:28:47 GMT -5
Thanks Teri! I think I'm ready now I have a work address I'm allowed to get mail sent to. I think I will write an introduction letter and ask about the rules then x That's not Terri who replied to you, it's happyhaddock! Were you looking for a response only from Terri? I don't think she comes on here that often. You really think your boss will like you getting letters from inmates while on the job? My opinion is you should keep your personal and professional life seperate. I don't see a problem with getting letters sent to you at home. Unless you don't want the inmate to know where you live, but if they are on death row, you have nothing to worry about.
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Post by wingnut49421 on Aug 10, 2009 2:28:01 GMT -5
my first thought was to write charles manson...well i found out through research that he is the most written inmate in us history!! so what are my chances of saying anything catchy to him to make him want to write back?? i am looking for a poor soul on death row to befriend?? anyone have any names for me??? any ideas?? wingnut49421
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ros
New Arrival
Posts: 5
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Post by ros on Mar 10, 2012 21:26:50 GMT -5
Don't openly criticise prison regulations, or discuss topics which are socially considered a hot-potato. If you you want to make a point be subtle and not offensive to anyone. If you can get your mail sent to a private post box that is a sensible idea and retains your privacy too.
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Post by blessed1 on Apr 2, 2012 18:26:09 GMT -5
Just remember they read everything you write and scan most of it. Modern tech has upgraded the mail room here in Texas by leaps and bounds. Make sure you keep your letters uplifting and up spirited. They like to hear about things going on in the free world. If you do not live in America or in the State that they are in maybe research some things and send it thru your letters. Keeping them up on the happenings of the world and their home state would be interesting.
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Post by jjjjjj on Jan 21, 2013 12:25:57 GMT -5
(Sorry but I don't get how to create a new thread !) Hello, I just discovered your website because of an article on www.vice.com. Is it possible to write and become a pen pal from France to an American prisoner ? How can I deal with the price of (quite expensive) stamps ? Thank you to anyone who'll be able to answer me.
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